Dad shares the heartbreaking subtle warning signs he missed before his son died by suicide

A father who lost his son to suicide has shared the subtle warning signs that he missed ahead of the tragedy.

Georgia father Ben Pargman has spoken of the anguish and regret he feels following the suicide of his son, Ari ‘Manny’ Pargman, on December 4, 2024, only four months after he began his college career.

Following Manny's death, Ben has called for parents to speak to their children about suicide as he had missed any signs.

He noted that his son’s childhood, in Sandy Springs , was filled with family, friends, school, sports, music and summer camp.

Speaking to local media, he even recalled a memory from Thanksgiving just gone where he saw his son appear in good spirits.

Ben Pargman has said he was 'naive' about the signs that his son was struggling with his mental health (Manny's Band Youtube)

He said: “I remember this Thanksgiving, just a couple months ago. There was a kids’ table and I walked out and Manny had everyone doubled over laughing. I don’t know what the joke was but he was just a fun, fun kid.”

Reflecting on it, the father said he now recognizes his son would project an image on the outside to mask the mental anguish he was feeling inside.

He continued: “He was dealing with some pretty troubling stuff — and one of his ways of managing that was to be happy and excited and cover it up."

Ben then noted how he believes he missed what he would call warning signs:

• He had lost weight
• He was sleeping a lot
• He started skipping social gatherings with friends

Ben reiterated the importance of speaking to children about suicide, and insisted the potential alternatives are considerably worse.

He said: “Just have the conversation. Just start it, trip over yourself and it’s ok. It’s ok to say, ‘Hey, I’m just checking in with you. Have you had thoughts of committing suicide?’

“And yeah, that’s awkward and difficult. But I promise you, it’s less awkward and difficult than going to your child’s funeral.

Manny's father said his son would 'mask' his internal mental anguish (Manny's Band/YouTube)

“I can’t do anything to help Manny. I was naive. I was ignorant. I didn’t know. And I missed it. And I don’t think it had to go that way, if I knew more than I knew.”

Mental health experts have also stressed the importance of parents talking to their children about suicide and mental health.

Kevin Tanner, the commissioner of the Georgia Department of Behavioral Health and Developmental Disabilities, said: “There’s been a misnomer. That talking about suicide will increase the likelihood that someone will commit suicide and that’s just not correct. It’s up to us to talk to our children about suicide.”

Following his death, Manny’s family has started a foundation for proactive suicide prevention called ‘Manny’s Band’, a play off his love for music.

If you’ve been affected by any of these issues and want to speak to someone in confidence, please don’t suffer alone. Call Samaritans for free on their anonymous 24-hour phone line on 116 123

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